It's been so weird last night and this morning preparing for class and thinking it is the last class already of this session. I have a lot I feel like I could say, but I know that everyone is so tired of reading and just need a break. So, I will just say that it has really been a pleasure and honor getting to know such an amazing group of people. It is hard to believe that it has only been 6 weeks since classes started. I have learned so much in the last 6 weeks, not just from classes, but so much from every one of you as well. Knowing I will have all of you with me for support and encouragement gives me so much more confidence and excitement for the future.
So, Thank you everyone, for everything.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
late night last blog
BAD TEACHERS!
We all remember them. We all do not want to be them. Then how do they exist? I probably have had fewer great teachers over the years that I've had bad teachers and I think that's pretty crappy. Why is this? Seriously? I guess when I think back on the teachers I've disliked the most over the years, the ones that really stand out were the ones that made me feel personally bad... like I had done something wrong... or that I could not actually confide in them or approach them.
Is it a sort of timidness by the teacher that makes this conflict arise? I remember resenting many teachers while I had class with them. It was like they had to go about their lives without being interrupted and if you interrupted them or messed with their way of doing things than you'd pay the price. By "you" I mean "I." Anyway. I feel like I have had some pretty dumb teachers over the years but those were not bad in the same way. These other teachers just seemed to hate all people. I don't know where I'm going with this because I love this class. I guess it's just something on my mind that I never want to do. I honestly can say that I feel that none of us in our class has the potential of being this type of teacher. Hopefully they're done and gone. I'm just tired and hot and cranky and I still have tons of homework to do so I'll end this rant right now and save us all some time. See you all tomorrow.
We all remember them. We all do not want to be them. Then how do they exist? I probably have had fewer great teachers over the years that I've had bad teachers and I think that's pretty crappy. Why is this? Seriously? I guess when I think back on the teachers I've disliked the most over the years, the ones that really stand out were the ones that made me feel personally bad... like I had done something wrong... or that I could not actually confide in them or approach them.
Is it a sort of timidness by the teacher that makes this conflict arise? I remember resenting many teachers while I had class with them. It was like they had to go about their lives without being interrupted and if you interrupted them or messed with their way of doing things than you'd pay the price. By "you" I mean "I." Anyway. I feel like I have had some pretty dumb teachers over the years but those were not bad in the same way. These other teachers just seemed to hate all people. I don't know where I'm going with this because I love this class. I guess it's just something on my mind that I never want to do. I honestly can say that I feel that none of us in our class has the potential of being this type of teacher. Hopefully they're done and gone. I'm just tired and hot and cranky and I still have tons of homework to do so I'll end this rant right now and save us all some time. See you all tomorrow.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Last but not least!
I've always struggled with subjects outside of my comfort zone, in my undergrad I often took the easier road, and gained very little from my experience there. Sara and Zalika's classes challenged me with the reading, writing, and daily discussions about everything from social justice to the social history of our public schools. These are generally topics that intimidated me in the past, and strange enough I know I will miss them, and not just because of the ingenious idea of having snacks. What's really scary in a good way is that I enjoyed every minute of it. I don't know about the rest of you, but its obvious Tuesdays and Thursdays were our more challenging days this term, and throughout this term, I've looked forward to these challenging days. I enjoyed the discussions, and getting to know everyone on a much more personal level. It's comforting that so many of us see eye to eye in a lot of these issues. As I'm sure the first term is just a taste for whats to come, I feel much more confident that we can handle what we're in store for in the upcoming terms. I don't know if its just the heat getting to me in my small 90 some odd degree apartment, but as time goes on, and we develop, I suddenly don't feel so scared about taking on a class full of 12 year olds. Or maybe its just feeling that I'm actually gaining from all of this. Its tough to say, regardless I think its a good state of mind to be in.
By the way everyone, great job on the puppet shows today! I had to say goodbye to Baron Von Noxious, it was sad, but I know that Jan will give him a much better home than I could, besides he was far to scary to bring into a classroom, I don't want the children to have nightmares about noxious weeds like I do. See you guys in the morning!
By the way everyone, great job on the puppet shows today! I had to say goodbye to Baron Von Noxious, it was sad, but I know that Jan will give him a much better home than I could, besides he was far to scary to bring into a classroom, I don't want the children to have nightmares about noxious weeds like I do. See you guys in the morning!
My Own Love of Reading
I was an early reader. No, no, it's true. And I give all the props to my awesomely, awesome Mom, who was really my grandmother, but she was Mom to me. Some of my earliest memories came from those special moments when I sat on my Mom's lap and we read books. My favorite was Katy No-Pocket by Emmy Payne and H. A. Rey. Katy was a kangaroo without a pocket, but then someone gave her an apron full of pockets and she was happy because she finally felt normal. Then I had another favorite about a snowplow who saved the day named Katy and the Big Snow by Virginia Lee Burton. I think I just liked snowplows back then. Next, there was Frederick by Leo Lionni, which featured a small mouse that seemed lazy during the busy harvest season, but in the dead of winter, the other mice realized that he was a wonderful storyteller that got them through the long, cold nights. I really could keep going on, but I want to have one blog post that isn't overly Rachael.
The point I am trying to make is that stories can be magical. In high school, I used to go over to my former elementary school to read stories to little kids. It was one of those things that I couldn't remember why I agreed to do it. I was busy with high school stuff, but I begrudgingly keep my word to show up. And I kept going back. You really couldn't have asked me to stop. I love reading to children. I tend to get into it, and I was so happy to listen to Zalika tell us stories because I saw that she gets into them, too.
So when you do read, read with heart. The children pick up on that. If you are excited, they feed off that. I saw it with a little girl this last year with a book called Skippy Jon Jones. The girl showed little to no interest in "word" books until Skippy Jon Jones came along. I like to think that it was my delivery, complete with accent and song, that may have shown her that reading can be fun and joyful. She may not have a mom at home reading to her or with her, and there are many more children out there like her, but we as teachers can still give the gift of magic. Have fun with reading and I hope that your students will, too.
The point I am trying to make is that stories can be magical. In high school, I used to go over to my former elementary school to read stories to little kids. It was one of those things that I couldn't remember why I agreed to do it. I was busy with high school stuff, but I begrudgingly keep my word to show up. And I kept going back. You really couldn't have asked me to stop. I love reading to children. I tend to get into it, and I was so happy to listen to Zalika tell us stories because I saw that she gets into them, too.
So when you do read, read with heart. The children pick up on that. If you are excited, they feed off that. I saw it with a little girl this last year with a book called Skippy Jon Jones. The girl showed little to no interest in "word" books until Skippy Jon Jones came along. I like to think that it was my delivery, complete with accent and song, that may have shown her that reading can be fun and joyful. She may not have a mom at home reading to her or with her, and there are many more children out there like her, but we as teachers can still give the gift of magic. Have fun with reading and I hope that your students will, too.
Last Blog :(
As I started to sit down for the first time in what seems like 57 days to catch up on the comedic stylings of my hero Chelsea Handler, I thought to myself, “There is one thing I know I am forgetting to do before I laugh my head off. Oh yes! I need to write my blog!” Or should I say, I get to. To be honest, at the beginning of this class I thought of these blog exercises as just another thing to add to our piles and piles of homework to do each day before and after class. To my surprise, the blogging has become one of my favorite pieces of homework in and out of Zalika’s class. I look forward to reading what other people have to say and wonder how everyone is doing. Sometimes we don’t get the opportunity to stop and think about what we are going through and rather just try to get things done. Blogging has given me the time to just sit down and really dig into my brain. I really hope that our cohort continues to blog and keep each other updated throughout the year and after our short time here at Lewis and Clark.
I have truly enjoyed this class. It has given me the opportunity to mesh different ideas together and start to make my own idea of what kind of a teacher I want to be. One of my favorite activities in this class was when we did the “I am From” poems. Listening to the poems read by my cohort is an experience that I will never forget. That, along with a lot of other experiences that we have been through together as a cohort will be little treasures that I will keep near and dear to my heart.
I also want to say that I am so appreciative. Before art today, a few of us were at Tryone Creek drinking a few ice colds and talking about how glad we are that we chose this program. We talked about the competing programs and why we didn’t choose them, why this one stood out to us, etc. Everyday, I am reminded to be so thankful that I am with such an incredible group of people. I couldn’t have picked a better group to surround myself with everyday then all of you. I am so glad that I chose this program and can’t wait to see what the rest of this year has in store for us!
Last Blog by HD
This final blog is hard for me to write. It’s hard to say goodbye to these classes and professors. I love these subjects. Social justice is part of why I got into teaching. I wanted to change how other people think, and I wanted to change how I think. I’m worried that going forward these topics won’t be as thoroughly addressed because we’ll be focused on curriculum subjects. I’m afraid to say goodbye to these classes because I’m afraid that I’ll stop growing. I know that half of the battle is becoming aware of the system in which we’re in. But I want to do more. There are readings that I will have to go back to again and again because they are so evocative and eye opening. I feel like I can never stop changing and growing, especially in my perception of equity issues, diverse cultures, and justice. There is always more to know and more depth of understanding to reach. I wish that we could meet and talk about these issues as a cohort, as a nation.
One of the most memorable parts of the course was watching the film “Boys of Baraka.” We’ve been discussing theory all along, and this film gave me a face and environment to analyze through the lenses of those theories. The emotion was so raw in that film, and the issues so current. To think that people are going through these struggles right at this moment is hard to take. It hurt from my insides, but it inspired me. The boys, families, and some of the counselors were truly amazing people. I felt such powerful, raw emotions. Love, fear, disappointment, hope. When the film ended I wanted more. Where are those boys now? What are they doing, and what are they thinking about? What do think about themselves? How are the families doing? What became of the Baraka School?
This is my last blog for a class assignment. I’ve loved this class. Thank you Zalika for all your ideas, comments, suggestions, and questions. I hate goodbyes. I’m such as sap! See you all tomorrow in class. Take care.
One of the most memorable parts of the course was watching the film “Boys of Baraka.” We’ve been discussing theory all along, and this film gave me a face and environment to analyze through the lenses of those theories. The emotion was so raw in that film, and the issues so current. To think that people are going through these struggles right at this moment is hard to take. It hurt from my insides, but it inspired me. The boys, families, and some of the counselors were truly amazing people. I felt such powerful, raw emotions. Love, fear, disappointment, hope. When the film ended I wanted more. Where are those boys now? What are they doing, and what are they thinking about? What do think about themselves? How are the families doing? What became of the Baraka School?
This is my last blog for a class assignment. I’ve loved this class. Thank you Zalika for all your ideas, comments, suggestions, and questions. I hate goodbyes. I’m such as sap! See you all tomorrow in class. Take care.
Twas the night...
'Twas the night before the last day of Zalika's class, when all through the house
Not a creature felt sweat-free, except for a mouse.
The fans were placed by the windows care,
In hopes that some coolness soon would be there.
My roommates nestled among other house's beds,
While visions of ice cubes danced in their heads.
And my cat Pepper sprawled on the carpet, not in my lap,
We had just settled our brains for a hot summer night's nap.
When out in the yard there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the couch to see what was the matter.
Barefoot and belligerent, I flew like a flash,
Threw open the door and got ready to dash.
The moon on the breast of the grass I need to mow,
Gave the lustre of some familiar people below.
When, what to my sleepy eyes should appear,
But all of Cohort 1, those people I hold so dear.
With Beth as the driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be a trick.
More rapid than passing essays in Sara's class, her coursers they came,
And she whistled, and shouted, and called some by name!
"Now Leah! now, Heather! now, Avni and Adrienne!
On, Rachael! On, Kyle! On , Catie and Dylan!
To the top of the campus! to the top of Rogers Hall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"
As good times that before the wild graduation fly,
When they meet with beer, not a person gets shy.
So up to Lewis & Clark the coursers they flew,
With a carpool full of reflective narratives, and puppets too.
And then, in a moment of silence, I heard on the roof,
The laughing and mingling of each Cohort 1 goof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney Jean Piaget came with a bound.
He looked really super smart, from his head to his foot,
And his books were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
A bundle of theories, he had flung on his back,
He informed me that of big questions I'll never lack.
(that's all for now)
Not a creature felt sweat-free, except for a mouse.
The fans were placed by the windows care,
In hopes that some coolness soon would be there.
My roommates nestled among other house's beds,
While visions of ice cubes danced in their heads.
And my cat Pepper sprawled on the carpet, not in my lap,
We had just settled our brains for a hot summer night's nap.
When out in the yard there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the couch to see what was the matter.
Barefoot and belligerent, I flew like a flash,
Threw open the door and got ready to dash.
The moon on the breast of the grass I need to mow,
Gave the lustre of some familiar people below.
When, what to my sleepy eyes should appear,
But all of Cohort 1, those people I hold so dear.
With Beth as the driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be a trick.
More rapid than passing essays in Sara's class, her coursers they came,
And she whistled, and shouted, and called some by name!
"Now Leah! now, Heather! now, Avni and Adrienne!
On, Rachael! On, Kyle! On , Catie and Dylan!
To the top of the campus! to the top of Rogers Hall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"
As good times that before the wild graduation fly,
When they meet with beer, not a person gets shy.
So up to Lewis & Clark the coursers they flew,
With a carpool full of reflective narratives, and puppets too.
And then, in a moment of silence, I heard on the roof,
The laughing and mingling of each Cohort 1 goof.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney Jean Piaget came with a bound.
He looked really super smart, from his head to his foot,
And his books were all tarnished with ashes and soot.
A bundle of theories, he had flung on his back,
He informed me that of big questions I'll never lack.
(that's all for now)
ABC versus 123
As I was running errands yesterday, I noticed a group of mothers with their children. the kids were between the ages of 2 and 3 years of age. One mother was telling the others that her child "new how to read." The other mother's seriously gasped in shock and said, "Really?" The original mother proceeded to point to letters on the window of the building as they passed by, and her son called out the letters...correctly I might add. I found it interesting that the mother did not care whether or not her son new numbers, but rather placed more emphasis and importance on him learning letters. I am not sure I would have even had this thought if not for our recent class discussions. As a culture, this situation shows how much more we value literacy than math. I couldn't think of a single parent I know that taught their children to recognize numbers at the same time as letters. Why are letters always first? Why are numbers put off until later? Why are ABCs taught with more emphasis from parents than counting? I don't have any answers here, just observations and more questions!
I guess that is what I have learned most from this and our other classes...to take a step back and observe what is going on, and ask questions about it. Looking closely at an idea or concept is just as important as looking at the bigger picture; in some cases it is more important, as with education. It is more important for us to observe closely what is happening with our students as they experience the learning process first hand, and to address specific situations. Yes, small changes will aid their learning in the big picture, but we can't clearly see the big picture, as we don't have the big picture in front of us, we only have the child (a small piece of the big picture of their educational experience as a whole).
I have always loved child development, but my experience has lent itself to preschoolers. It is fantastic to see into the lives and minds of elementary students from a developmental perspective. As a parent, I am more aware of what is to come, and as a teacher, I am more aware of who is to come (into my class). Your thoughts, experiences, and questions have been so insightful, and I thank you collectively as a group for being so wise! I chose Lewis & Clark because I wanted to surround myself with a high quality of knowledge from both the staff and my peers. I can say, proudly, that I see greatness every day that I am with you all and our professors! You all encourage me to do my best, be my best, and bring my best to class, and for that I thank you!!! Thank you Zalika for inspiring us to do great things, and for sharing so much of who you are as a person, and as a teacher, with us!!! I agree with Lindsey, I only wish we had more time together with you!
I guess that is what I have learned most from this and our other classes...to take a step back and observe what is going on, and ask questions about it. Looking closely at an idea or concept is just as important as looking at the bigger picture; in some cases it is more important, as with education. It is more important for us to observe closely what is happening with our students as they experience the learning process first hand, and to address specific situations. Yes, small changes will aid their learning in the big picture, but we can't clearly see the big picture, as we don't have the big picture in front of us, we only have the child (a small piece of the big picture of their educational experience as a whole).
I have always loved child development, but my experience has lent itself to preschoolers. It is fantastic to see into the lives and minds of elementary students from a developmental perspective. As a parent, I am more aware of what is to come, and as a teacher, I am more aware of who is to come (into my class). Your thoughts, experiences, and questions have been so insightful, and I thank you collectively as a group for being so wise! I chose Lewis & Clark because I wanted to surround myself with a high quality of knowledge from both the staff and my peers. I can say, proudly, that I see greatness every day that I am with you all and our professors! You all encourage me to do my best, be my best, and bring my best to class, and for that I thank you!!! Thank you Zalika for inspiring us to do great things, and for sharing so much of who you are as a person, and as a teacher, with us!!! I agree with Lindsey, I only wish we had more time together with you!
Last Blog...
Like some of you, I too was hesitant about the blog. I thought I would constantly be comparing myself and trying to make mine just as long as the others and loose touch with what I actually should be doing, however, it ended up being a great way to reflect and to build our cohort community. That is one thing I have to say about Zalika's class is that above all other classes, this one has really helped us bond. We have been put on the spot together, opened our hearts to each other, and dealt with real and emotional things. I think it has been so beneficial in more ways than academically. This cohort thing has been my favorite way to learn yet! I think back to undergrad and how I maybe knew one or two people in the class, but never deeply or importantly, and it seems strange that I had a learning environment like that now. It has only been six weeks, but this place has reshaped me and seriously inspired me. Thank you to everyone for being so willing to open yourselves up for this experience, and thank you Zalika for helping us get here! It will be sad to have classes that are mixed and have a different dynamic than ours... I will have to let go of my cohort 1 biases!! haha You guys are awesome.
power of books
I had never heard of the books that Zalika showed us on Tuesday. Books are such a great way to show complexities in an approachable manner. I remember watching, as the public librarian would sometimes come to the Head Start classrooms to read to the students. It was magical. Books are such a great escape into new worlds, so much knowledge and insight to gain with a turn of a page. I am going to be sure to become good friends with the school librarian as well as the public librarian to learn of some good recommendations.
I cannot believe that tomorrow is it for our first four graduate classes. I’m excited to finally be able to unpack but I’m saddened because I feel that there is still so much more to learn. I guess that is why we continue into next summer, and also why I have decided to become a teacher. We never quit learning to teach. This thought excites me. I can’t even begin to tell you how great it feels for my brain to be activated again. I had no idea that I missed school so badly. It’s such a great forum to hear great discussions with great people. I appreciate everyone’s insights. And, I’m looking forward to seeing your artistic reflections tomorrow. Oh, and the puppet shows today cracked me up.
I cannot believe that tomorrow is it for our first four graduate classes. I’m excited to finally be able to unpack but I’m saddened because I feel that there is still so much more to learn. I guess that is why we continue into next summer, and also why I have decided to become a teacher. We never quit learning to teach. This thought excites me. I can’t even begin to tell you how great it feels for my brain to be activated again. I had no idea that I missed school so badly. It’s such a great forum to hear great discussions with great people. I appreciate everyone’s insights. And, I’m looking forward to seeing your artistic reflections tomorrow. Oh, and the puppet shows today cracked me up.
Blog a boo
Whoa! Chris and I just watched a documentary about N.W.A. the other night. I think he was inspired in some way, because the next day he said "I programmed the old school rap channel on your Sirius." I thought, "They have that? YES!!" Anyways, I was pretty stoked when Coolio -Fantastic Voyage came on last night. Also, another tidbit for you, when I was downtown around 4, the car said 113 degrees. Can you believe it?!
Ellie - I don't know if you'll get this since it's our last blog - I think? But, I've had a lot of the same questions about funding for resources. I can tell you from my experience thus far, the schools order the textbooks for the most part. Along with any workbooks and such that go along with it. For books for your classroom library - I would start hunting now. I see libraries have books at farmer's markets sometimes for super cheap. You can also ask around to librarians to see if they will be doing any book drives or book exchanges, and maybe you can participate in the exchange, or nab any leftovers. I was lucky and took about 3 boxes of chapter books from Cathedral's book exchange, because they were just leftover. I know most librarians also know other librarians, so it just couldn't hurt to make a friend and ask how you can get books as cheap as possible. Depending on the school, there may also be art supplies in a work room up for grabs, or divied up among teachers at the start of the year. Every teacher I've ever worked with totally hoarded supplies, even hid them. And they always had their name and grade written all over everything, which just goes to show that there isn't much funding anywhere to replace items. Some schools have set budgets so you can purchase things and get reimbursed, like art supplies or movies. I think it really depends on the school. I know a lot of teachers shop garage sales, and clearance sales, and just sort of stock up when you can on all sorts of things. I've also heard of teacher's getting a "signing bonus" when they come on as a new teacher to help ease the cost of setting up a new room. That would be something you'd find out in an interview. I'm sure you already know a lot of this, but maybe we could talk more sometime because I am always curious how veteran teachers have so much awesome stuff.
I've really enjoyed this class. I feel that I've learned much, much more than I did in undergraduate classes about similar topics. Maybe those classes were awful, or maybe I'm just a different learner now? Either way, I am confident that I got the most I could out of this class and I'm pumped about all the new knowledge. I love thinking about it in terms of - will I be able to answer someone when they ask me WHY I did something in my classroom? And I want it to be a super sweet response so they are blown away by my intelligence and ability,and trust my decisions. I know I can do that. I've got a lot of good information to fuel my philosophies.
Zalika, thank you for offering your talents if we need you in the future. I think I speak for us all when I say that a. we wish you were our mentor teacher and b. we've learned a great deal from you.
Ellie - I don't know if you'll get this since it's our last blog - I think? But, I've had a lot of the same questions about funding for resources. I can tell you from my experience thus far, the schools order the textbooks for the most part. Along with any workbooks and such that go along with it. For books for your classroom library - I would start hunting now. I see libraries have books at farmer's markets sometimes for super cheap. You can also ask around to librarians to see if they will be doing any book drives or book exchanges, and maybe you can participate in the exchange, or nab any leftovers. I was lucky and took about 3 boxes of chapter books from Cathedral's book exchange, because they were just leftover. I know most librarians also know other librarians, so it just couldn't hurt to make a friend and ask how you can get books as cheap as possible. Depending on the school, there may also be art supplies in a work room up for grabs, or divied up among teachers at the start of the year. Every teacher I've ever worked with totally hoarded supplies, even hid them. And they always had their name and grade written all over everything, which just goes to show that there isn't much funding anywhere to replace items. Some schools have set budgets so you can purchase things and get reimbursed, like art supplies or movies. I think it really depends on the school. I know a lot of teachers shop garage sales, and clearance sales, and just sort of stock up when you can on all sorts of things. I've also heard of teacher's getting a "signing bonus" when they come on as a new teacher to help ease the cost of setting up a new room. That would be something you'd find out in an interview. I'm sure you already know a lot of this, but maybe we could talk more sometime because I am always curious how veteran teachers have so much awesome stuff.
I've really enjoyed this class. I feel that I've learned much, much more than I did in undergraduate classes about similar topics. Maybe those classes were awful, or maybe I'm just a different learner now? Either way, I am confident that I got the most I could out of this class and I'm pumped about all the new knowledge. I love thinking about it in terms of - will I be able to answer someone when they ask me WHY I did something in my classroom? And I want it to be a super sweet response so they are blown away by my intelligence and ability,and trust my decisions. I know I can do that. I've got a lot of good information to fuel my philosophies.
Zalika, thank you for offering your talents if we need you in the future. I think I speak for us all when I say that a. we wish you were our mentor teacher and b. we've learned a great deal from you.
Last Blog
First of all I'd like to say that this has been my favorite class this summer. I'm not even entirely sure of the reason. I liked the subject matter of science with Kip more and Sara's class has been intellectually challenging. It's not that this class isn't interesting or challenging, but that's not the reason that I like it so much. Maybe it is the community, maybe it's the ice-breakers and delicious snacks, who knows.
It has been great to get to know everyone through class and the blog. Who knew Jesse likes N.W.A.? (RIP Eazy E) I really like Michelle's idea of having a blog for her future classroom. It has helped to get to know all of the quiet people in class (including myself).
I really don't know where I was going with this blog. But now I'm listening to N.W.A. too. F*** the Police
It has been great to get to know everyone through class and the blog. Who knew Jesse likes N.W.A.? (RIP Eazy E) I really like Michelle's idea of having a blog for her future classroom. It has helped to get to know all of the quiet people in class (including myself).
I really don't know where I was going with this blog. But now I'm listening to N.W.A. too. F*** the Police
When Heat and Late 80's Hip-Hop Collide
I am sitting in my dark, dismal, mostly unpacked basement listening to N.W.A., and reflecting on my earlier conversation with Aron about how excessive heat creates murderous people. But this has really nothing to do with what I want to write about.
For the last couple years I have been fighting what I have come to call a severe case of "the cynicism." I came down with disease a couple of years ago when I went to a college that professed to have some sort of profound affect on ones spiritual life. Instead finding positive revelation and clarity, I came to realize that I really, truly, dislike a lot of people. They say stupid things, they do stupid things, and sometimes, they even look stupid. I quickly found myself trapped in a thick cloud of overwhelming disgust with so many things about the world with which I had previously had no problem. It didn't help that most of my friends were going through the same thing (yes, I had friends, despite my earlier statement about hating people).
Sometime around the preparation to get married, I had to do some serious thinking about my cynical inclinations. "You know, Jesse," I told myself, "being grouchy about everything doesn't do you a whole lot of good. In fact, you kind of suck." So, there you have it. I realized that being so cynical about everything had really taken away the joy from a lot of wonderful things in my life. I try now to focus on being critical rather than cynical, a big distinction. For me, being critical means to take a thoughtful look at the world around. Why do I feel they way I do or think the way I think? Then, being critical encourages me to take action. Cynicism, on the other hand, only made me a sedentary, whinny jerk. Don't get me wrong, I am not fully recovered. Also, cynical people tend to have my favorite senses of humor.
In regards to teaching, I see clearly the danger in being cynical (how many more times can I use that word in this post). I figure, the harder I work now at redirecting those tendencies, the better off I will be when I get into the classroom.
For the last couple years I have been fighting what I have come to call a severe case of "the cynicism." I came down with disease a couple of years ago when I went to a college that professed to have some sort of profound affect on ones spiritual life. Instead finding positive revelation and clarity, I came to realize that I really, truly, dislike a lot of people. They say stupid things, they do stupid things, and sometimes, they even look stupid. I quickly found myself trapped in a thick cloud of overwhelming disgust with so many things about the world with which I had previously had no problem. It didn't help that most of my friends were going through the same thing (yes, I had friends, despite my earlier statement about hating people).
Sometime around the preparation to get married, I had to do some serious thinking about my cynical inclinations. "You know, Jesse," I told myself, "being grouchy about everything doesn't do you a whole lot of good. In fact, you kind of suck." So, there you have it. I realized that being so cynical about everything had really taken away the joy from a lot of wonderful things in my life. I try now to focus on being critical rather than cynical, a big distinction. For me, being critical means to take a thoughtful look at the world around. Why do I feel they way I do or think the way I think? Then, being critical encourages me to take action. Cynicism, on the other hand, only made me a sedentary, whinny jerk. Don't get me wrong, I am not fully recovered. Also, cynical people tend to have my favorite senses of humor.
In regards to teaching, I see clearly the danger in being cynical (how many more times can I use that word in this post). I figure, the harder I work now at redirecting those tendencies, the better off I will be when I get into the classroom.
First 6 weeks - Whew!
It is hard to believe that we are almost done with the first 6 weeks of grad school. How did that happen?! I am so glad that even though we are moving into the next phase of classes, we won't be leaving behind the wonderful community we have created within our cohort. I know, we'll have to be mixed cohort-ed for the next few weeks (oh no!), but when we return for the fall, we will be together again, and the sense of trust and community will fall right into place. At first, I didn't really understand LC's emphasis on the cohort, but now I do. I can't imagine learning on the same level with a constant upheaval and turnover of classmates.
By the way, my mind is now more aware of white privilege - I was putting on a band aid this morning (cutting cardboard with a pocket knife is not a good idea), and I realized that it was pretty close to my skin color. This is probably a very obvious form of white privilege, but I'd never really thought about it before. Do they make "diverse" band aids? They should.
Look who's keeping me company as I blog...
By the way, my mind is now more aware of white privilege - I was putting on a band aid this morning (cutting cardboard with a pocket knife is not a good idea), and I realized that it was pretty close to my skin color. This is probably a very obvious form of white privilege, but I'd never really thought about it before. Do they make "diverse" band aids? They should.
Look who's keeping me company as I blog...
Let's do story time more!
Wow, I can't believe that it is actually over. It seems like just yesterday when I was sitting here trying to figure out how to do this damn blog thing, and just couldn't for the life of me figure it out. Here I now sit, an old pro, and thinking that this came to an end entirely too fast.
I loved class yesterday. I have to say that it was in part for having multiple workshops, which are always interesting to do, as well as a great icebreaker, that reduced many to fits of laughter... But my favorite was the last "tools" section that we had. I really wish that we were able to do more of this type of work. Maybe in another class...
Having Zalika tell us some of the useful things that she does with her class and students really helped give me some ideas of how to apply the knowledge that we have been learning for the past few weeks. With all of this information and all of these resources that we have been building, it's nice to actually see how it can be used from one who has used them.
I also loved story time. I almost think that it would be worthwhile in class to have a story time every day. Pick one child's book that relates to something that we are learning about and read it aloud. This would not only be nice to see some of the great children books that are available, but it would also give us ample resources that we can take into the room to teach children about some of the issues that we all discussed throughout these last 8 weeks. Anyways, that's all I have for now... Peace out all, and thanks again Zalika for all you've taught us.
I loved class yesterday. I have to say that it was in part for having multiple workshops, which are always interesting to do, as well as a great icebreaker, that reduced many to fits of laughter... But my favorite was the last "tools" section that we had. I really wish that we were able to do more of this type of work. Maybe in another class...
Having Zalika tell us some of the useful things that she does with her class and students really helped give me some ideas of how to apply the knowledge that we have been learning for the past few weeks. With all of this information and all of these resources that we have been building, it's nice to actually see how it can be used from one who has used them.
I also loved story time. I almost think that it would be worthwhile in class to have a story time every day. Pick one child's book that relates to something that we are learning about and read it aloud. This would not only be nice to see some of the great children books that are available, but it would also give us ample resources that we can take into the room to teach children about some of the issues that we all discussed throughout these last 8 weeks. Anyways, that's all I have for now... Peace out all, and thanks again Zalika for all you've taught us.
Dyslexia
When I was a young child, probably pre-school or very early elementary, I was tested and diagnosed as dyslexic. But dyslexia takes funny forms. I never, ever had trouble reading. Writing was different, but not as important. So my parents decided to not tell me that I was dyslexic. They were afraid it would hold me back.
I grew up thinking I was just dumb. A good reader, but mostly dumb. It took me several years to learn how to tie my shoes. Left and right could reduce me to tears. I didn't learn how to accurately read an analog clock until I was 18 years old. And I still don't trust myself to use them. Far better to switch numbers on a digital clock than to get so frustrated that I forget why I am looking at the time in the first place. I was the kid trying to figure out how to put the fit the geometric blocks in with other shapes; another activity that could make me cry. Math and standardized tests...well, you know how in Thank You Mr. Falker, Tricia describes numbers and letters as all watery? That's what scantron forms look like to me. And geometry, a subject that my teachers promised would be easier than algebra, was a nightmare. Still is, actually.
Around my 18th birthday, my parents just mentioned to me that I was dyslexic. I was shocked. You mean, all those spelling tests where I knew how to spell the word but somehow put z instead of s...that wasn't me being dumb? And there is actually a kind of dyslexia associated with directionality (up/down, in/out, left/right) and just because I can fold a map doesn't mean I have to be able to read it?
I have since questioned my parent's decision. I think that if they knew how much I struggled with all the other tasks I was asked to do that weren't related to reading, they probably would've sought help for me. That might have made some parts of my childhood much easier. It would be nice to have strategies at my disposal for deciphering lefts and rights and shapes. But we all do what we think is best, right?
After leaving Zalika’s class today, I couldn’t help thinking how I just wanted her to keep going on and on about her tools for the classroom and great books that she uses to integrate curriculum. I wonder if we will take a class this year that will help us with specific tools for the classroom. I think that would be wonderful, and I vaguely remember the student teachers at Catlin telling me that they had to read hundreds of children’s books before the year was over. From what I can tell there seems to be millions of children’s books out there so how do you differentiate the ones of substance, like Taky the Penguin from others that do not open up amazing dialogue.
My second question is about funding. How do teachers pay to have their rooms set up and get all the materials, like books, for their students? I am guessing that the school provided the basics, desks, tables, projector, but what about all the other essential stuff. All the classrooms I have visited had hundreds of books, did the teacher buy them out of his/her own pocket? I know this may sounds like I am obsessed with the small practical things but I just hope we get to learn more and more tools for classroom curriculum and resources.
Is this really our last blog? I am going to kind of miss blogging - or at least reading everyone else's blogs!
Final class blog, but not my last....
Wow! I can't believe that the past six weeks went so fast. It feels like just yesterday that I felt like I was going to die of anxiety, having to sing in front of a bunch of strangers. We have come so far and created such a safe, community atmosphere in such a short period of time. I want to thank Zalika for facilitating the opportunities that have allowed us to get to know each other and ourselves better. This has been a wonderful class and in many ways has felt as much therapeutic, as it was educational. In addition, I have actually warmed up to the idea of blogging. At first I found this to be uncomfortable and I felt very exposed. I had never put my words or thoughts online before and tend to be a fairly private person, so this was a whole new world for me. As I began to feel more comfortable and trusting, it became an enjoyable way to share my thoughts. I especially found this to be a useful tool for people like me who are not always talkative in class, to be able to participate in a class discussion. When I am a teacher, I plan to create a blog that parents and students can follow. I think it is a great way to keep everyone updated about what is going on in the classroom and future ideas. It also allows for another opportunity for communication and making everyone feel included. I will of course send out news letters as well, because not everyone has a computer and/or Internet access. The more dialogue and information, the better.
I loved this class and think that this was a great way to begin the program. As much as I am ready for a weekend to relax and actually get to spend some time with my very neglected husband, I am sad to see this come to an end. I also have to say that I loved hearing about the books that Zalika uses in her class and having two of the books read aloud. I don't think that I will ever grow out of loving having stories read to me. Thank you Zalika!
I loved this class and think that this was a great way to begin the program. As much as I am ready for a weekend to relax and actually get to spend some time with my very neglected husband, I am sad to see this come to an end. I also have to say that I loved hearing about the books that Zalika uses in her class and having two of the books read aloud. I don't think that I will ever grow out of loving having stories read to me. Thank you Zalika!
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Bloggy McBlogerson
Ah, blogging. My new best friend. I have to say, that as much of a stink I put up in the first place, I am starting to really get the hang of this nonsense. Hey, you might even catch me blogging about my two-week vacation in August. In fact, I might even start blogging about my weekends and what sorts of educational wisdom, questions, and, as Elicia would put it, “mind blowings” that occur in my every day life!
But really, joking aside, I find myself really thinking about this stuff every day. I love that the ONLY option we have for this program is to do it full time. And I love, as Zalika said, that even though our cohort gets a bit nutty with worry from time to time, we are a dedicated bunch that brings a certain intensity and scholarliness to each subject we take on. And I love it! I love being completely wrapped up in school and being ABLE to be. Talk about privilege—look at us and how awesome our situation is!
But I also agree with some of the things we’ve been discussing in class lately about how you ultimately have the choice and control over a lot of things in life. Each of us, for one reason or another, chose to be here. And we each made it happen. We made the decision to take school seriously enough to have the smarts to get into such a good school. We also were all willing, one way or another, to make the financial sacrifice to be at Lewis & Clark, not the cheapest school, but in my opinion, the best and most exciting in the area. Good for us! And you know what, after talking to some peers who are in programs at PSU and George Fox, believe me, we have made the right decision.
I love the notion of teaching as a political act, something that the LC MAT program in particular is all about, and can’t help but think that every one of us will bring this aspect into our classes in one way or another and make some major differences in a lot of lives and in society all together.
And much like Beth, I am feeling like these past 6 weeks have flown by and could have used a few more in these classes. But that just shows how dedicated we are and how seriously we take all of this. Big ups, everyone.
Finally, I would like to share a wonderment I have been having (you know, so I don’t have to blog about it this weekend, or in August). In this class, even though I came in with a VERY biased opinion of Montessori schools, I ended up LOVING her philosophy. However, I think that my biases come with some good reason. I felt the way I did about these school because all the kids I knew who went to them tended to be my rather, okay, super well-off friends who attended the school in elementary, then went on to our private middle and high school. But it seemed like these people all came in with something special indeed, but also a lack of knowledge of how to get along in a “normal” and therefore real-world school. Also, the only other prior connection I had prior to this was my brother’s girlfriend spouting about the school because she works at one. She has a 6-year-old daughter, who I spent more time with than my own brother this part Christmas, who had also just started attending a Montessori school and no-doubt had grown up with her mother’s Montessori-like parenting techniques.
To get to the point though, and thus to my question, I noticed that all of the kids I’ve encountered who have been deeply entrenched in the Montessori world seem to lack a very necessary set of real-world skills. I refer mostly to the skill of patience, but also to the sense of selflessness. Please, go along with my gross over-representations here that I realize are unfair….Because Montessori kids have the opportunity to kind of do whatever they want for as long as they want, they seem to miss out on some vital skill-building around work-ethic and stick-to-it-iveness. I see this being manifested in our already “Me-oriented” and “I NEED it now” society and tend to think that it would only be deepened by such a classroom environment. What does a teacher in a Montessori classroom do about those kids who don’t just love working on their projects? I know, observe and shape the project to something that they’d like. But how does a Montessori theorist prepare their elementary students to successfully transition into a regular public school classroom without losing any of that-which-is-awesome about the theory? I would love to have the opportunity to visit an actual Montessori classroom to seek some of these answers...
My apologies for how scattered this blog has turned out—I think of my brain as a fried-egg right now!
But really, joking aside, I find myself really thinking about this stuff every day. I love that the ONLY option we have for this program is to do it full time. And I love, as Zalika said, that even though our cohort gets a bit nutty with worry from time to time, we are a dedicated bunch that brings a certain intensity and scholarliness to each subject we take on. And I love it! I love being completely wrapped up in school and being ABLE to be. Talk about privilege—look at us and how awesome our situation is!
But I also agree with some of the things we’ve been discussing in class lately about how you ultimately have the choice and control over a lot of things in life. Each of us, for one reason or another, chose to be here. And we each made it happen. We made the decision to take school seriously enough to have the smarts to get into such a good school. We also were all willing, one way or another, to make the financial sacrifice to be at Lewis & Clark, not the cheapest school, but in my opinion, the best and most exciting in the area. Good for us! And you know what, after talking to some peers who are in programs at PSU and George Fox, believe me, we have made the right decision.
I love the notion of teaching as a political act, something that the LC MAT program in particular is all about, and can’t help but think that every one of us will bring this aspect into our classes in one way or another and make some major differences in a lot of lives and in society all together.
And much like Beth, I am feeling like these past 6 weeks have flown by and could have used a few more in these classes. But that just shows how dedicated we are and how seriously we take all of this. Big ups, everyone.
Finally, I would like to share a wonderment I have been having (you know, so I don’t have to blog about it this weekend, or in August). In this class, even though I came in with a VERY biased opinion of Montessori schools, I ended up LOVING her philosophy. However, I think that my biases come with some good reason. I felt the way I did about these school because all the kids I knew who went to them tended to be my rather, okay, super well-off friends who attended the school in elementary, then went on to our private middle and high school. But it seemed like these people all came in with something special indeed, but also a lack of knowledge of how to get along in a “normal” and therefore real-world school. Also, the only other prior connection I had prior to this was my brother’s girlfriend spouting about the school because she works at one. She has a 6-year-old daughter, who I spent more time with than my own brother this part Christmas, who had also just started attending a Montessori school and no-doubt had grown up with her mother’s Montessori-like parenting techniques.
To get to the point though, and thus to my question, I noticed that all of the kids I’ve encountered who have been deeply entrenched in the Montessori world seem to lack a very necessary set of real-world skills. I refer mostly to the skill of patience, but also to the sense of selflessness. Please, go along with my gross over-representations here that I realize are unfair….Because Montessori kids have the opportunity to kind of do whatever they want for as long as they want, they seem to miss out on some vital skill-building around work-ethic and stick-to-it-iveness. I see this being manifested in our already “Me-oriented” and “I NEED it now” society and tend to think that it would only be deepened by such a classroom environment. What does a teacher in a Montessori classroom do about those kids who don’t just love working on their projects? I know, observe and shape the project to something that they’d like. But how does a Montessori theorist prepare their elementary students to successfully transition into a regular public school classroom without losing any of that-which-is-awesome about the theory? I would love to have the opportunity to visit an actual Montessori classroom to seek some of these answers...
My apologies for how scattered this blog has turned out—I think of my brain as a fried-egg right now!
FREE BLOG, IS IT THE LAST ONE????
We are down to the wire with classes and it has been an inspiring term. I’m realizing that six weeks is too short a time. I want to thank Zalika for sharing some of her thoughts and ideas with us today. It was great to hear the books she shared with us and to learn some tools that we can use in our classrooms. I also really like the idea that she is willing to come and sit in on our classrooms as we student teach. I think this is a wonderful gift that she has bestowed upon us.
I am currently getting all my things together for the portfolio, looking through our assignments and reflecting on our various readings. As I do this I can imagine future students of mine doing the same task. It is a wonderful way to become inspired once again in the work that we have been doing. Things from week one bounce back into focus. And then I decided to go and read the blogs again. I was a little nervous about blogging to begin with, being new to the sport and all. But in the end it is a great tool to learn from each other. Everyone has unique things to share with the class. This is a great way to keep discussions going or to open up avenues to new discussions. I appreciated how honest people were with their posts and this help set our community up.
The end is near and I am ready to go and discover new things but am hesitant to leave the safety of this wonderful nest Zalika has built for us. I sometimes feel like I am falling off of the mountain of information that we have gained. I know that it will come into focus and that we will have one another to share ideas with and support each other in times of stress. We will all come back to the time that we had in this class and remember when our community became a solid force in each of our lives.
Monday, July 27, 2009
I was in love with school as a little kid, so I figured...I might as well just plan on hanging out here all the time. Except for a short stint where for some reason, when asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I would answer, "A bartender." Immediately followed by my mom and stepdad sort of cringing and shaking their head at me as if, "Oh jeez, why does she keep saying that..." Maybe I was just trying to mess with them. There's something funny about a 7 year old saying they want to be a bartender though. Did I even know what alcohol was? Anyways. That desire faded.
After I decided I wanted to teach, I spent pretty much the rest of my educational years looking for opportunities to work with kids. I babysat, worked with church camp groups, tutored, childcare (nanny) for family friends, worked in a preschool etc. In high school, I took all of the child development oriented courses. One class included putting together our own preschool for real students, that arrived at the end of the term for a few hours a day for one week. I think they were 4 year olds. That was fun.
I started out at U of O in the Elementary Education program. During the summer (and before college) I would work at my stepdad's mortgage company and babysit when I could. I grew up in the mortgage business, since it was just always around if I needed a job. I enjoyed it too. I was helping people get into homes, which was rewarding. I learned a ton from this experience and I really appreciate the access to the professional world I was given at a very young age. I transferred to Portland State University and continued on the path to be a teacher. I just couldn't handle Eugene anymore, it was too small. I was working in mortgages still, and had a 2nd job too. For a while, I got the taste of making good money and almost quit school. I worked all the time, because I was being greedy, and neglected building my experience with children. Then, I began to justify to myself just working in the mortgage world to make a career, and why would I go back to teaching when I won't make any money? I really think I was a different person for a few months. I took a term off from Portland State to get my ducks in a row. I realized that I had lost touch with why I wanted to teach in the first place; I loved working with children and wanted to be a great teacher in someone's life. I wanted kids to have the positive experience in school that I did. I had never cared about money until I started having some and I really learned a lot about myself during that time. I started up again the very next term, and finished up with a Social Science degree and Elementary Education minor. The social science degree was highly recommended from PSU for teachers. It was a good broad stroke of several classes to take into grad school. The Elementary Ed minor has also been really helpful to have plenty of background into a lot of the topics we study.
After PSU, I got married (the same day as graduation actually) and decided to take a year off between undergrad (which took me 6 years) and graduate school. The plan was to get my Master's degree, just not right away. A friend hooked me up with the Instructional Assistant job at Cathedral School this past year. I was the assistant in the 4th and 5th grade classrooms, as well as the assistant for the Spanish teacher who taught K-8. I also had the pleasure of being at all 3 recess breaks for all grades. Recess was often my favorite since I got to talk to all the kids. And they are just darn funny. I stepped out of my comfort zone as a new employee and started a recess rewards program with the principal. I enjoyed the leadership opportunity to work with the principal and staff for a positive program for the kids. Cathedral was a great experience to learn how the school worked, work with ALL different kids of faculty, work in the classroom, see the magic behind the curtain in the life of a teacher and also to work with children of all ages. It was a good chance for me to test the water. I felt at home when the teachers would ask me to take over a lesson with the whole class (me? really? yes, of course I will!), work in small groups, help with projects, develop curriculum ideas and display student artwork creatively. I was anxious to have my own classroom. This practice and experience was essential to build my confidence in my career choice. The teachers I worked with were great. They knew I wanted to teach so I think they would throw me the reins as much as possible. I fell in love with teaching, if I wasn't there already.
Next, I put all of my eggs in one basket, and only applied to Lewis and Clark. I feel very fortunate to be in this successful program.
I want to be a teacher because I had such great teachers. I am still in close contact with one of my elementary school teachers, and he continues to motivate me today. It's an amazing profession that we have all picked. I love being around children and I look forward to developing my career in education.
After I decided I wanted to teach, I spent pretty much the rest of my educational years looking for opportunities to work with kids. I babysat, worked with church camp groups, tutored, childcare (nanny) for family friends, worked in a preschool etc. In high school, I took all of the child development oriented courses. One class included putting together our own preschool for real students, that arrived at the end of the term for a few hours a day for one week. I think they were 4 year olds. That was fun.
I started out at U of O in the Elementary Education program. During the summer (and before college) I would work at my stepdad's mortgage company and babysit when I could. I grew up in the mortgage business, since it was just always around if I needed a job. I enjoyed it too. I was helping people get into homes, which was rewarding. I learned a ton from this experience and I really appreciate the access to the professional world I was given at a very young age. I transferred to Portland State University and continued on the path to be a teacher. I just couldn't handle Eugene anymore, it was too small. I was working in mortgages still, and had a 2nd job too. For a while, I got the taste of making good money and almost quit school. I worked all the time, because I was being greedy, and neglected building my experience with children. Then, I began to justify to myself just working in the mortgage world to make a career, and why would I go back to teaching when I won't make any money? I really think I was a different person for a few months. I took a term off from Portland State to get my ducks in a row. I realized that I had lost touch with why I wanted to teach in the first place; I loved working with children and wanted to be a great teacher in someone's life. I wanted kids to have the positive experience in school that I did. I had never cared about money until I started having some and I really learned a lot about myself during that time. I started up again the very next term, and finished up with a Social Science degree and Elementary Education minor. The social science degree was highly recommended from PSU for teachers. It was a good broad stroke of several classes to take into grad school. The Elementary Ed minor has also been really helpful to have plenty of background into a lot of the topics we study.
After PSU, I got married (the same day as graduation actually) and decided to take a year off between undergrad (which took me 6 years) and graduate school. The plan was to get my Master's degree, just not right away. A friend hooked me up with the Instructional Assistant job at Cathedral School this past year. I was the assistant in the 4th and 5th grade classrooms, as well as the assistant for the Spanish teacher who taught K-8. I also had the pleasure of being at all 3 recess breaks for all grades. Recess was often my favorite since I got to talk to all the kids. And they are just darn funny. I stepped out of my comfort zone as a new employee and started a recess rewards program with the principal. I enjoyed the leadership opportunity to work with the principal and staff for a positive program for the kids. Cathedral was a great experience to learn how the school worked, work with ALL different kids of faculty, work in the classroom, see the magic behind the curtain in the life of a teacher and also to work with children of all ages. It was a good chance for me to test the water. I felt at home when the teachers would ask me to take over a lesson with the whole class (me? really? yes, of course I will!), work in small groups, help with projects, develop curriculum ideas and display student artwork creatively. I was anxious to have my own classroom. This practice and experience was essential to build my confidence in my career choice. The teachers I worked with were great. They knew I wanted to teach so I think they would throw me the reins as much as possible. I fell in love with teaching, if I wasn't there already.
Next, I put all of my eggs in one basket, and only applied to Lewis and Clark. I feel very fortunate to be in this successful program.
I want to be a teacher because I had such great teachers. I am still in close contact with one of my elementary school teachers, and he continues to motivate me today. It's an amazing profession that we have all picked. I love being around children and I look forward to developing my career in education.
Stacy's Story!
I think I have always wanted to be a teacher and didn't really know it. I specifically remember being in fourth grade and thinking "I love the way my teacher did that, I want to teach like her!" and then in fifth grade thinking, " I would never do that to my students! I have to make sure I do that differently!" I had no idea at twelve years old that I had a desire to be a teacher, but when I think back there were "warning signs" along the way. I went through many aspirations of what I wanted to be when I grew up; I recently found an essay I wrote my freshman year of high school and I wanted to be a pediatrician. Well, that dream died hard when I couldn't live up to the math and science aspects of the medical profession and throughout high school I never even gave much of a thought of what I would be; in the back of my mind however, it was always with kids.
I don't know the exact moment I decided to teach, but it just felt right. I had no experience with children other than baby-sitting, and for some reason my senior year of high school I felt compelled to go into elementary education. I started my teaching journey at OSU and after my first practicum in a second grade classroom I was hooked. From then on I worked in three other practicums and a term as a preschool teacher at a Head Start preschool on the Oregon State campus ( same pre-school as Anne and Kyle). Although my experience there was less than desirable, it not only solidified my desire to become a teacher, it fostered in me the need to be an advocate for my students. During that time was when I discovered Lewis and Clark, and it felt like the place I needed to be to grow as not only a teacher, but a place where I could develop the skills and knowledge to actually become that advocate. I feel like my passion grows more and more with every experience I have with children, and now even more in this program.
My story is not one of self-discovery or of wanting to go into a profession to be an agent of change in the world, but throughout my journey of becoming a teacher that is exactly what I have become. I don't know what compelled me to be a teacher, I only knew that I wanted a job with children and one that I was excited to get up for, I feel like there was never any other profession for me and somehow I have been drawn into it. I am so happy I was! I now know who I am and why I am in this profession, and I cannot imagine anything different for my life.
Why teaching
My journey into teaching as a profession has been a long one. There have been many twists and turns along the way. Teaching has always been in the back of my mind. When I first went to college I had no idea what I should be doing. I’ve always had a passion for fitness so I looked to a career path in that direction. Research didn’t interest me. I decided to share my enthusiasm for being active with children. My undergraduate field of study was physical education.
I have had some times of doubt about teaching. As a male and a bodybuilder it isn’t something that I should be doing. It has been a struggle to come to the realization that many people will never understand why I chose teaching. They all say I should be a high school teacher and coach a sport. That may be where I end up, but I doubt it. I love the enthusiasm and willingness that elementary age children bring to the classroom. When I’m teaching something that I am confident in, it doesn’t ever feel like work. I cannot imagine doing anything other than teaching. Being an educator helps me learn about myself through my interactions with others.
One insight that I have had after my first week is that there seems to be a disconnect between American educational values and the reality of the educational system. Most Americans talk about free and equal education for all. Free and equal is on of the cornerstones of American ideology. Teachers have great ideas for providing excellent educational experiences for children. Somewhere along the way the system in many places around the country is not in tune with these ideas. Lack of funding and staff affect the students that need the most help.
I have had some times of doubt about teaching. As a male and a bodybuilder it isn’t something that I should be doing. It has been a struggle to come to the realization that many people will never understand why I chose teaching. They all say I should be a high school teacher and coach a sport. That may be where I end up, but I doubt it. I love the enthusiasm and willingness that elementary age children bring to the classroom. When I’m teaching something that I am confident in, it doesn’t ever feel like work. I cannot imagine doing anything other than teaching. Being an educator helps me learn about myself through my interactions with others.
One insight that I have had after my first week is that there seems to be a disconnect between American educational values and the reality of the educational system. Most Americans talk about free and equal education for all. Free and equal is on of the cornerstones of American ideology. Teachers have great ideas for providing excellent educational experiences for children. Somewhere along the way the system in many places around the country is not in tune with these ideas. Lack of funding and staff affect the students that need the most help.
My story...
The most significant question that has led me to where I am is, “What do I want to do with my life?” To pick just one profession out of countless choices seemed like an impossible task at times. Although I’ve had doubts before, I am confident now that teaching is my answer. The next question I ask myself is, “What is more important, making money, or making a difference?” If there is one thing I’ve come to understand after working with children, it is how much of a difference one adult can make in the life of a child. While working in my preschool I had numerous parents express to me how much their child thinks of me, and I can think of no better reward than impacting lives in a positive manner. Furthermore, the incredible amount of self-fulfillment I have found in working with children can not be measured in monetary terms. Lastly, there is sadly a shortage of positive male role models for many children and if I can play a part in filling there void, that's just one more reason for me to be proud of teaching.
My first notable classroom experience was a field practicum at Lincoln Elementary in
In the last six months of my undergraduate studies, I had the opportunity to work with two different Head Start preschools. To be perfectly honest, my first preschool experience made me second guess my desire to become a teacher, but in the last 3 months I became more inspired than ever. I believe the true difference between the first and second half was my ability to be a part of the children's welfare. During my first three months, I primarily observed students and teachers. In contrast, during the last three months, I constructed the lesson plans and followed through with them. This contact with my students allowed me to relate with them in the role of teacher, and the experience gave me confidence in my ability to connect with students. It also gave me the confidence to apply to work at a preschool.
When I moved to
Raised in a family of teachers/coaches, I’ve always understood what it takes to be an educator. I know first-hand that the job isn’t easy, and it requires much more sacrifice than most people understand. I know there will be rough times ahead, and there isn't anything I'd rather be pursuing.
My goodness! I'm excited to get to work, as I'm sure all of us are. See you in the morning!
I want to be a teacher....
On my journey into becoming a teacher, I am excited, nervous, humbled, and honored to have the responsibility of educating young minds. There are many reasons behind my pursuit of becoming an educator. I would have to say the main push for me to do it at this point in my life is that working in the social services world was getting very hard on me, and with the times that we are currently in, I did not think that it would be getting any easier. My favorite part of my job was the teaching part. If it was teaching adults English, to educating people on different community resources, I loved to share knowledge and learn and grow from one-another. I find it fascinating to learn new strategies on how to teach something, because we all know that the way that one person may get it, will not suffice for someone else who may need a totally different instruction set to comprehend the same lesson. This both excites me and makes me nervous. I am sure that everyone has had lesson plans that have flopped, and the important part is to pick up where you left off and try again.
I am sure that I will feel sometimes overwhelmed and saddened from situations in the school. I know the importance of education, and when public education is done right, I truly believe that it can open doors for many people who may not other wise have such opportunities. I know that we have so many barriers to equality, but I truly believe that public education can be a great equalizer. I know that I will be fed up through the bureaucracy of “the system” but if I put my passion into the classroom, my hope is that I may inspire my students to love learning.
I am sure that I will feel sometimes overwhelmed and saddened from situations in the school. I know the importance of education, and when public education is done right, I truly believe that it can open doors for many people who may not other wise have such opportunities. I know that we have so many barriers to equality, but I truly believe that public education can be a great equalizer. I know that I will be fed up through the bureaucracy of “the system” but if I put my passion into the classroom, my hope is that I may inspire my students to love learning.
Why Anne Marie wants to be a teacher....
When I think about the reasons as to why I want to be a teacher, the influences that I have had in my life are what come to mind. Growing up, I was surrounded by educators. My mother is a teacher and two of my aunts are also teachers. I noticed growing up that my mother would never say, “I’m going to work.” She would always say, “I’m going to school.” When I was about eight, I asked my mom why she goes to school and not work, like most of the parents that I knew. She explained to me that she loves her job so much that she doesn’t consider it work. She looks at school as an adventure and opportunity to better the lives of children. Throughout the course of my life thus far, I have always aspired to have a career that I don’t consider “work.”
My passion for teaching goes beyond the influences of my mother. When I was in 6th grade, I had the most excellent teacher a child could ask for. He is one of those teachers who make every student feel that they are special. He teaches in a way that enables all types of learners to be able to understand the material. Not only was I lucky to have him as a teacher because he helped me so much, he is the reason why I want to become a teacher. I know it sounds cliché and everyone has that special mentor but he has a lot to do with me choosing this career path. As I went through high school and college, I still wasn’t sure if I wanted to go into teaching because I was scared that I was going into this profession just to follow my mother, Then, I had another teacher that again, confirmed for me that I want to be a teacher. I stepped into my chemistry class with a lot of anxiety because science is one of my weaker points. As I progressed throughout the term, the professor that I had made me absolutely love chemistry. I looked forward to going to lecture and ironically enough loved taking the midterms and final because it was such a fun subject for me. This is another example of a teacher who had the ability to make students want to learn the subject; even if it is something that they aren’t necessarily good at. I aspire to be that type of teacher.
As I started my practicum classes that let me actually work with children, I knew that teaching was the right choice for me, my calling. I looked forward to spending everyday with the children that I worked with and loved making a difference in the lives of kids. During my spring term of my senior year, I worked in a pre-school class at a school called Bates where the OSU students run every class. It was a time that I felt like a teacher and my direct impact on children was a feeling I couldn’t explain. I remember talking to my lead teacher about it one day and I told her that no matter how rough of a day I was having, the smiles on the children’s faces everyday made it worthwhile. I can’t wait to be a teacher and I know I will never consider it work.
I decided to become a teacher because I believe that everyone is responsible for contributing to their society in a positive way. I hope to help children feel heard and important and I hope to show others that children are so incredibly important to our collective future.
In Strength to Love by Dr. King, he writes, “Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. Hate multiplies hate, violence multiplies violence, toughness multiplies toughness in a descending spiral of destruction.” (page 53) This quote has stayed with me because of how powerfully it speaks to the idea of education. Hatred comes from fear and fear comes from not knowing. By helping people know each other and the world we share, we become less afraid. As teachers we have the rare and amazing opportunity to help children learn new ways to be in the world and be with each other. I decided to become a teacher because I believe in ideas of social change and responsibility and I want to live and work towards those beliefs.
Why I Teach...
As a student, I didn't feel a connection to education through my school or my teachers, but rather through the process of learning. I loved gaining new insight and knowledge, whether through reading or listening to others. I would spend hours in the library after school and read any book I could get my hands on. Of course, for those of you who are younger than me, you have to remember that during my education, the age of the internet did not exist to me yet. I was not particularly happy with my home life, so I would escape into the lives of others through literature. Reading wasn't just my hobby, it became my passion. Now, as most of you can imagine, this did not lend itself to popularity, but that didn't matter to me much. I was labeled as "the smart kid," simply because I enjoyed learning, not necessarily because of my grades (of which I did not discuss, but yes they were good). I felt a discussion of my grades would only add to my unpopularity. My love for learning did not become a good thing until college, when I was immediately surrounded by people who shared my passion for knowledge.
Yes, I love kids, and yes, I love being surrounded by children, but my main goal in teaching is to share my passion for knowledge with my students and help them ignite their own joy of knowledge. I love the fact that education is so different from my own, in that there is no rote memorization of facts that will be tested in a multiple choice format. Instead, we are aware of multiple intelligences and teach to many unique children rather than a group of faces. I love listening to a child share their passion of new knowledge. It is music to my ears, when my children say, "Guess what I learned today?" Understanding and using a multiple intelligences approach to teaching and assessing allows all students an opportunity to gain and share new knowledge through their unique intelligence strengths. I believe this change in education allows students to be excited about learning, and share their new knowledge with excitement.
I became a teacher, because the "aha, light bulb moment" of understanding is exciting to be a part of, questioning the world around you is admirable, and seeking new knowledge with passion and purpose is invaluable.
Yes, I love kids, and yes, I love being surrounded by children, but my main goal in teaching is to share my passion for knowledge with my students and help them ignite their own joy of knowledge. I love the fact that education is so different from my own, in that there is no rote memorization of facts that will be tested in a multiple choice format. Instead, we are aware of multiple intelligences and teach to many unique children rather than a group of faces. I love listening to a child share their passion of new knowledge. It is music to my ears, when my children say, "Guess what I learned today?" Understanding and using a multiple intelligences approach to teaching and assessing allows all students an opportunity to gain and share new knowledge through their unique intelligence strengths. I believe this change in education allows students to be excited about learning, and share their new knowledge with excitement.
I became a teacher, because the "aha, light bulb moment" of understanding is exciting to be a part of, questioning the world around you is admirable, and seeking new knowledge with passion and purpose is invaluable.
Ellie's Story!
As a child I never had any grand ideas about what I want to do when I was an adult. I just always loved school and was very enthusiastic about learning. I also was very family oriented and knew that one of the things that I wanted to do in my life was to have a family and raise kids. Part of this maybe from being the oldest child and the oldest grandchild in my family, I always had the role of organizing my siblings and cousins which I enjoyed, and still do. I have also always been very people oriented; I never enjoyed spending time alone and always liked talking and interacting with people.
When I went to college I chose to go to Lewis & Clark after thinking for years that I wanted to go back east. At the last minute I chickened out and decided that I really wanted to stay in the Northwest and attend school. Lewis & Clark had been the only school that I applied to in
As someone who is always looking forwarding and planning for the next step in my life, going to graduate school immediately after graduation seemed like the obvious choice for me. I knew that I wanted to stay in
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Jessica's Story..... (the abridged version)
I have always wanted to be a teacher. We had to do research on a profession in 8th grade, and there I was, interviewing my 3rd grade teacher and thinking about what grade I would want to teach. I went into high school with that in the back of my mind, but not really knowing how it would play out. I spent a lot of time babysitting, and I volunteered at a therapeutic horseback riding program for kids with disabilities, which was some of the most meaningful interactions with kids that I have ever had.
I decided to go to Lewis & Clark for undergrad, and had no idea what to major in. Even though my mom told me she wouldn't pay for college if I majored in music (because she had tried to make a career out of her music major, and it just wasn't stable), I decided to anyway, with the stipulation that I would focus in music education because it had a definite job at the end of it. Within my major, and within the liberal arts pieces of the college, I took classes that I knew would be beneficial to a teaching career - Psych 100, Developmental Psych, Education 200. Even my study abroad experiences ended up focusing on children and education. My senior focus in music education had me student teaching in an elementary music classroom the fall semester, and a middle school band the spring semester. I loved the younger kids, and discovered that middle school kids freak me out.
While I would love to teach music, I am afraid that I won't get a job because music programs are constantly being cut. I decided that it was the classroom and the kids that I loved, and that I could incorporate music into any classroom I taught.
At first I thought I might attend PSU because there was an opportunity for getting both a k-8 and an elementary music masters, but by the time I tried to apply, it was way past the application deadline. Recovering from the I-have-ruined-my-life panic attack, I decided to see if LC was still accepting applications. I hadn't really considered it because it seemed to be too much of the same, and I thought maybe it wouldn't look good on a resume if I did both undergrad and grad at LC. I attended an info session, and I was blown away. It sounded like such a fabulous program, and I knew it was the place for me. So, here I am, and I am happier and happier with my decision every day. I never knew I could learn so much.
I decided to go to Lewis & Clark for undergrad, and had no idea what to major in. Even though my mom told me she wouldn't pay for college if I majored in music (because she had tried to make a career out of her music major, and it just wasn't stable), I decided to anyway, with the stipulation that I would focus in music education because it had a definite job at the end of it. Within my major, and within the liberal arts pieces of the college, I took classes that I knew would be beneficial to a teaching career - Psych 100, Developmental Psych, Education 200. Even my study abroad experiences ended up focusing on children and education. My senior focus in music education had me student teaching in an elementary music classroom the fall semester, and a middle school band the spring semester. I loved the younger kids, and discovered that middle school kids freak me out.
While I would love to teach music, I am afraid that I won't get a job because music programs are constantly being cut. I decided that it was the classroom and the kids that I loved, and that I could incorporate music into any classroom I taught.
At first I thought I might attend PSU because there was an opportunity for getting both a k-8 and an elementary music masters, but by the time I tried to apply, it was way past the application deadline. Recovering from the I-have-ruined-my-life panic attack, I decided to see if LC was still accepting applications. I hadn't really considered it because it seemed to be too much of the same, and I thought maybe it wouldn't look good on a resume if I did both undergrad and grad at LC. I attended an info session, and I was blown away. It sounded like such a fabulous program, and I knew it was the place for me. So, here I am, and I am happier and happier with my decision every day. I never knew I could learn so much.
Waiting and wondering
When I first went to college, I wanted to be a doctor. I wanted to be kind and treat both the emotions and the body. The science classes, particularly chemistry, were really hard. I cried a lot and stayed up late many nights. I was a very committed student, but I didn’t understand it all. I started to wonder, should I stick with the grueling program so that I can reach the ideal job? Or should I take the stress as a sign that this wasn’t for me?
Then I chose to focus on psychology. I knew that I was definitely interested in counseling rather than research. I had a job working in a baby research lab. I had always been afraid of kids when I was little – I didn’t know what to do when they cried! This was different. They were so interesting and lovely to get to know. Senior year I got serious about going into social work, and even got recommendations from my professors. But I just wasn’t sure, so I didn’t apply.
After college I did temporary work and then worked at Michael’s. There were some sweet families that were regulars at the store. People started to see me as being kind and compassionate. They thought I was good with kids. I started to wonder if this was true.
I finally decided to end my job at Michael’s and work for the public schools. I was interviewed for an IA position. That was two years ago. I definitely made a lot of mistakes as an IA. I was not firm enough, and I started my relationships with my students as a peer more than an authority. But I really wanted to do a good job and improve. After the first year, I knew that I wanted to go to the next step and be a teacher. Teachers are so influential in people’s lives. I knew that working with kids was in the cards for me. I took a special education class at Portland State to decide about being a resource room teacher, and that solidified my decision. By then it was time to apply for graduate schools for the following year. At the time I wanted to get into any teacher program that would accept me and start teaching. I knew that Lewis and Clark had a good reputation, but I underestimated how helpful that could be. With every class and every reading it gets deeper and more amazing.
Now that I’m here I know that this is where I need to be. I still have a lot of fears and doubts. Maybe some of those fears can make me a better teacher. They can push me to always strive to be better.
Then I chose to focus on psychology. I knew that I was definitely interested in counseling rather than research. I had a job working in a baby research lab. I had always been afraid of kids when I was little – I didn’t know what to do when they cried! This was different. They were so interesting and lovely to get to know. Senior year I got serious about going into social work, and even got recommendations from my professors. But I just wasn’t sure, so I didn’t apply.
After college I did temporary work and then worked at Michael’s. There were some sweet families that were regulars at the store. People started to see me as being kind and compassionate. They thought I was good with kids. I started to wonder if this was true.
I finally decided to end my job at Michael’s and work for the public schools. I was interviewed for an IA position. That was two years ago. I definitely made a lot of mistakes as an IA. I was not firm enough, and I started my relationships with my students as a peer more than an authority. But I really wanted to do a good job and improve. After the first year, I knew that I wanted to go to the next step and be a teacher. Teachers are so influential in people’s lives. I knew that working with kids was in the cards for me. I took a special education class at Portland State to decide about being a resource room teacher, and that solidified my decision. By then it was time to apply for graduate schools for the following year. At the time I wanted to get into any teacher program that would accept me and start teaching. I knew that Lewis and Clark had a good reputation, but I underestimated how helpful that could be. With every class and every reading it gets deeper and more amazing.
Now that I’m here I know that this is where I need to be. I still have a lot of fears and doubts. Maybe some of those fears can make me a better teacher. They can push me to always strive to be better.
What many of you have heard before, but here you go...
Growing up I never thought that I wanted to become a teacher. I had wonderful teachers in school that were able to make class fun and interesting for me, yet I never wanted to be in their shoes. Growing up painfully shy, I thought that it would be terrifying to stand in front of 30 children having their eager eyes watch me, even worse to realize that there were 30 students who were fidgeting or falling asleep. It sounds like a nightmare in the same realm of arriving at school and realizing that you left your clothes at home, not a job for me.
Even though the idea of teaching scared me, I did love working with children and did many jobs and volunteer work around kids. With this in mind, I first thought to become a pediatrician. I soon realized that this would not be a good idea due to the fact that I pass out at the first signs of blood. Next I thought about becoming a child psychologist. This idea seemed more within my grasp. Working one-on-one, no blood; sounds great. So this is where I was when I began college. I took all of my required courses for a psychology major, emphasizing on child development and child psychology. When I finished all the available courses I threw in a couple education courses just to round out this “child centered” education.
After college I wanted to get right to the field of child psychology. I wanted to apply this information that I had spent the last 4 years (and a few tens of thousands of dollars) to get. I began working at a local therapeutic treatment center. I was trained in working with children, talking to them when they were upset, and how to restrain children when they were violent. I should have known right off the bat that I wasn’t up for working with violent children, but I did what I was taught, and stuck with it. I worked for a full year, acting the part of glorified babysitter, making sure that children (teenagers actually) were acting how we wanted them to and doing what we told them to do. It took 12 months of being cussed at, hit, punched, bit, and at one point, stabbed in the face, to realize that this was not my calling.
At this point I arrived at my first “quarter-life” crisis. I have all this knowledge about children, how can I use it? I have grown a lot as a person since high school and realized that the idea of standing in front of 30 children no longer terrified me, it actually sounded kind of fun.
So now I am arriving at my final week of my first "term" learning how to become a teacher and I am ready... Maybe not ready to be that perfectly great teacher in the classroom, but I am ready to put what I've been learning to the test and begin to hone my teaching abilities. I am so excited about doing this and ready to get into this life that will be draining, exhausting, fun, rejuvenating, make you want to pull out your hair and yell, laugh when you finally reach "that" kid, challenging, time consuming, creative, and overall a great way to spend the next 40 years. Watchout kids, here I come!
Even though the idea of teaching scared me, I did love working with children and did many jobs and volunteer work around kids. With this in mind, I first thought to become a pediatrician. I soon realized that this would not be a good idea due to the fact that I pass out at the first signs of blood. Next I thought about becoming a child psychologist. This idea seemed more within my grasp. Working one-on-one, no blood; sounds great. So this is where I was when I began college. I took all of my required courses for a psychology major, emphasizing on child development and child psychology. When I finished all the available courses I threw in a couple education courses just to round out this “child centered” education.
After college I wanted to get right to the field of child psychology. I wanted to apply this information that I had spent the last 4 years (and a few tens of thousands of dollars) to get. I began working at a local therapeutic treatment center. I was trained in working with children, talking to them when they were upset, and how to restrain children when they were violent. I should have known right off the bat that I wasn’t up for working with violent children, but I did what I was taught, and stuck with it. I worked for a full year, acting the part of glorified babysitter, making sure that children (teenagers actually) were acting how we wanted them to and doing what we told them to do. It took 12 months of being cussed at, hit, punched, bit, and at one point, stabbed in the face, to realize that this was not my calling.
At this point I arrived at my first “quarter-life” crisis. I have all this knowledge about children, how can I use it? I have grown a lot as a person since high school and realized that the idea of standing in front of 30 children no longer terrified me, it actually sounded kind of fun.
So now I am arriving at my final week of my first "term" learning how to become a teacher and I am ready... Maybe not ready to be that perfectly great teacher in the classroom, but I am ready to put what I've been learning to the test and begin to hone my teaching abilities. I am so excited about doing this and ready to get into this life that will be draining, exhausting, fun, rejuvenating, make you want to pull out your hair and yell, laugh when you finally reach "that" kid, challenging, time consuming, creative, and overall a great way to spend the next 40 years. Watchout kids, here I come!
Saturday, July 25, 2009
blogging about stuff
I see teaching as a means not to just teach facts to children, but also a way to influence how they perceive, absorb, and shape the world around them. I believe that teachers will make the future landscape of our country a better one. And it is my hope that by becoming a teacher I can in the end better my community. These are the reasons that I have chosen teaching as a profession.
I, like some others, did not graduate from college and head directly into the teaching profession. I have had several jobs, some I loved and some that just let me live. My community has always been important to me. I think that it is because my family always had the knack for moving at the moment I was finally feeling settled. We moved from South Africa when I was four. I was about to head into the school system and we moved to New Hampshire. We moved to California right when I was to start eighth grade. It was a very hard transition. I then decided to go to college in Portland, Oregon, away from family and friends. Then I decided to move back to California right after graduation.
I moved back home and took care of my grandmother for six months. It was safe and I did not have to worry about getting a job. I was with my mother and grandmother and that was home, but it always had a feeling of only being home because of them and not because it was were my heart felt at peace. I longed for a community that I could be a part of and my dear friend reminded me that Portland had always been the place that I had loved since the moment I stepped foot into the city. After two years of living in California, feeling detached from everything around me I decided to move back to Portland, to be home with my heart and soul.
I did not have a job, a boyfriend but I did have love. I had the love of the city around me, the love for my dear friends and the school that made me the adult I had turned into. I had thought at that time to enter graduate school and then decided I was not ready. I was scared to take the leap. Instead I got a job. Another Lewis and Clark grad had just started his own company. It was a leap of faith to work for him. The sales pitch he gave me was “I really can’t pay you much and there are no benefits but you can bring your dog to work and it will be fun.” Well it was. I ended up seeing Philippines and being a part of a company that did good things for the poor in a far away community. During that time I met my husband. He had worked for a friend of mine and she thought we were meant for each other. Funny how friends are so often right about that sort of thing. We got married, bought a house and settled in with one another. I had the stability to leave the job and do something else with my life. Grad school loomed and I thought, oh no not yet, I am not yet ready. Off I went to work at the barn that I rode at. I was surrounded by wonderful people, I was able to take my riding to a new level and to learn all about horses. I was thrilled to be a part of this community and I loved being with everyone that made up the barn. My horse was hurt over a year ago. I, along with countless others, tried to nurse her back to health but not much was working. She was fine out in the field but she could no longer jump and that is how we compete. I decided to turn her out to pasture and off she went to live at my friends in Goldendale, WA.
My life had hit a road block. Was I to keep riding, was I to keep working at the barn, was it time to take the leap into the field of teaching? I had finally settled into a place that was home for me. I had everything. The family, the community and the trust that it was going to be this way forever for me. I had grown up. It had taken awhile and this was not a bad thing. I had become extremely comfortable in my own skin and for me this was a major point in enabling me to take the leap and apply to grad school.
I took the risk. I put myself and my dreams out there. It turned out to be one of the best things I have done in my life. I want to impart on students that it is okay to take risks. Being confident in ones self is an important lesson that all children need to learn. Instilling confidence in them will help them be able to take on the challenge of learning. Being a teacher is a special task that takes an amazing person to do. I think we have all begun to see how true that is and how lucky we are to be surrounded by twenty two amazing people. Lewis and Clark has established a community of learning that allows us to thrive and I am thrilled to be a part of it.
It's Just the First Step to World Domination
My story has been told, and frankly, I am getting bored by it, so I can only imagine how the rest of you feel...
My decision to go into teaching is almost entirely political. I had grown up in political activist groups, and after doing some work in environmental justice, I had wanted to go into documentary filmmaking in order to drawn attention to social and environmental issues that plague not only our country, but the world. Yeah, I want to save the world, so what? I am idealistic, but that is tempered by a stark realism about the how this world really works. I got my feet wet in documentary/reality television production, and then took a corporate job during a bout of temporary insanity. I cannot stand capitalism in the way that it works in the US, and working for "the man" really didn't sit well with me. I described the job as "sucking my soul." But of course, working on low or no budget documentaries is a hard way to get by in this world, especially for someone with my expensive tastes. That is a joke. I'm going into teaching, remember?
I thought about environmental law (coincidentally here at LC), but that seemed to be a life of banging my head against a very big, indifferent wall. Maybe a victory here and there could keep me going, but I knew myself better than that. Hmm. I started looking for work in the non-profit sector, and it seemed that the bulk of that work involves grant writing and fundraising. I hate asking people for money, so cross that one off. Then it dawned on me while watching Michael Moore's Sicko. Public education is a big non-profit, and it is more personal and immediate than lawsuits or fundraising campaigns.
Once I had the whole education realization, my past came gurgling up to reveal that I have been on a path to be a teacher for a lot longer than I had previously noticed. I still find it ironic that it took me this long to realize how teaching encompasses nearly everything I need out of a career. Yet, if I had chosen this when I was 22, I don't think I would have been a very good teacher: too impatient, too idealistic, too militant. It took many, many life lessons to show me that you must work for change rather than just demand it.
Of course, going through this MAT program will help me make better and more effective science documentaries for children, which is also part of the plan. And then I'll become attached to someone running for presidential office, who will make me Secretary of Education, and then as 42nd in line to succeed the President, I will assume the Presidency of the Colonies after the Cylons destroy most of the human race. Yup.
My decision to go into teaching is almost entirely political. I had grown up in political activist groups, and after doing some work in environmental justice, I had wanted to go into documentary filmmaking in order to drawn attention to social and environmental issues that plague not only our country, but the world. Yeah, I want to save the world, so what? I am idealistic, but that is tempered by a stark realism about the how this world really works. I got my feet wet in documentary/reality television production, and then took a corporate job during a bout of temporary insanity. I cannot stand capitalism in the way that it works in the US, and working for "the man" really didn't sit well with me. I described the job as "sucking my soul." But of course, working on low or no budget documentaries is a hard way to get by in this world, especially for someone with my expensive tastes. That is a joke. I'm going into teaching, remember?
I thought about environmental law (coincidentally here at LC), but that seemed to be a life of banging my head against a very big, indifferent wall. Maybe a victory here and there could keep me going, but I knew myself better than that. Hmm. I started looking for work in the non-profit sector, and it seemed that the bulk of that work involves grant writing and fundraising. I hate asking people for money, so cross that one off. Then it dawned on me while watching Michael Moore's Sicko. Public education is a big non-profit, and it is more personal and immediate than lawsuits or fundraising campaigns.
Once I had the whole education realization, my past came gurgling up to reveal that I have been on a path to be a teacher for a lot longer than I had previously noticed. I still find it ironic that it took me this long to realize how teaching encompasses nearly everything I need out of a career. Yet, if I had chosen this when I was 22, I don't think I would have been a very good teacher: too impatient, too idealistic, too militant. It took many, many life lessons to show me that you must work for change rather than just demand it.
Of course, going through this MAT program will help me make better and more effective science documentaries for children, which is also part of the plan. And then I'll become attached to someone running for presidential office, who will make me Secretary of Education, and then as 42nd in line to succeed the President, I will assume the Presidency of the Colonies after the Cylons destroy most of the human race. Yup.
It all started with a chiding from Dad...
From the age of 5 until my first year of college, I wanted to own a record store. My logic: I like music. Well, sometime around the age of 18 I realized that owning a record store would probably lead to a life of depression and failed relationships, modeled after the characters in the novel/film “High Fidelity.” One night, rather late, I had some friends over at my house (well, my parent’s house), and apparently I was talking loudly. So loudly, my dad felt inclined to storm down the stairs, and then outside in his underwear to yell uncharacteristically, “Damn it Jesse, your voice is so loud! You should be a teacher!”
That statement planted the seed, although I knew, of course, that a loud voice does not necessarily determine my abilities to be a teacher. I started working at a preschool and eventually built a large clientele of babysitting connections that I have been able to escape. I soon discovered that working with children was at once exhausting, challenge and completely rewarding. Plus, the kids I worked with kept me entertained, and therefore, boredom was never an issue.
I finally came back to PSU to finish undergraduate work (apparently studying ancient Hebrew was not the key to academic happiness), focusing on education so that I could get into a teaching program. I took every class I could that concerned teaching. I discovered that not only was I passionate about working with children, but also the issues of public education. I have an unshakable conviction: I must teach. There is not a question in my mind about needing to teach. However, the more I work with kids and the more I pursue this life in education, the more questions develop about how best to serve the children of my community through my teaching. It’s a BIG job. I am not going to be perfect, and I am going to make mistakes, I do not doubt my ability to put myself in my work and do my best.
Finally, I want to mention that children think that I am funny. Some of them laugh at my jokes. Why wouldn’t I want to spend everyday with them?
That statement planted the seed, although I knew, of course, that a loud voice does not necessarily determine my abilities to be a teacher. I started working at a preschool and eventually built a large clientele of babysitting connections that I have been able to escape. I soon discovered that working with children was at once exhausting, challenge and completely rewarding. Plus, the kids I worked with kept me entertained, and therefore, boredom was never an issue.
I finally came back to PSU to finish undergraduate work (apparently studying ancient Hebrew was not the key to academic happiness), focusing on education so that I could get into a teaching program. I took every class I could that concerned teaching. I discovered that not only was I passionate about working with children, but also the issues of public education. I have an unshakable conviction: I must teach. There is not a question in my mind about needing to teach. However, the more I work with kids and the more I pursue this life in education, the more questions develop about how best to serve the children of my community through my teaching. It’s a BIG job. I am not going to be perfect, and I am going to make mistakes, I do not doubt my ability to put myself in my work and do my best.
Finally, I want to mention that children think that I am funny. Some of them laugh at my jokes. Why wouldn’t I want to spend everyday with them?
If you know what you want to do, then do it!
I have always known I want to help people and to work with young people. The more schooling I acquired, the more I realized just how many opportunities education offers. Sometime in the midst of college, I realized that I truly believe that education can save the world. I feel that the more you know about something, the less possible it is to have a problem with it. And if you know all about it and you still have a problem with it, then you must have some pretty good reason for it. That’s sort of the idea behind some of my save-the-world-stuff. Just to eliminate ignorance and create opportunity and advocacy for all.
I also knew though, that by the time I was done with college, I was done with school for a while. So I went into Social Work somewhat by chance. It turned out that I loved that too, because I was indeed working with young people and helping them. With Boys and Girls Aid, I had many amazing opportunities to work with a plethora of different kids. I even got to help create and initiate the first and only homeless shelter for youth in Washington County. About a year into that though, the shelter youth had changed from mostly homeless youth to mostly Behavioral Rehabilitation Service youth. It was grueling. And I got burnt out. By January 2008, I was ready to move on….
Between searching for jobs, I also did some research into grad schools. Unfortunately, I realized that Lewis & Clark’s program was the one I wanted to attend about a week too late. So I gave up the dream, at least for a while. A couple months later I got an amazing promotion to case manage a Transitional Living Program for young adults. I LOVED this job. It was not only the perfect job, but the youth in the program were allowed to stay in service for up to two years, so I was able to build really close, amazing relationships with them. At the shelter, it felt as though by the time I finally had a deep conversation with them was when I was driving them to court, and on their way to detention. But with the Transitional Living Program, not only would have weekly, or even daily amazing conversations, I was the sole person in their lives advocating for them and helping give them the tools they needed to create a life for themselves. It was so exciting.
Then, last summer, my best friend broke her back. Needless to say, it was a hard situation to work through. Her parents living in Colorado, it was up to us and her friends to take care of her. Her (at times, morphine-induced) sense of humor was amazing throughout the whole healing process. She had a name for all of her medical crap, like Bruce the back brace, and Cathy the catheter. Laughing through it somehow made it bearable for us all. By December, she walking around and having coffee dates with me just as we’d used to.
One day, we were having a conversation about dreams. The very day before she had broken her back, she had told me her five year plan, which included quitting her job, going to India, and working on some sort of self-sustaining farm for awhile. And the next day it all changed. In discussing this, and how amazing it is that all your plans just change sometimes due to things outside your own grasp, I mentioned grad school. “Guess I’m not going this year either”, I said. Hearing the tinge of lament in my voice, she basically reamed me. She said something along the lines of “Screw you, don’t just give up on or put off your dreams just because you didn’t get around to them. Make them happen.” It was an epiphany. With about two weeks until the deadline, I worked my butt off to apply to grad school.
The other kick in the butt that I had was from a co-worker, who is also in school for early elementary. She was telling me about her program, and I said something like, “that sounds so great! I’ve always wanted to be a teacher too!” She looked at me crossly. Being much older than I, she told me about how long it had taken her to finally settle on this career. She said, “Lani, if you know what you want to do, then do it!” I guess I had never thought of it that way before. But it was all history from there.
I am so happy now and have realized just in these past few weeks how much I enjoy being in school and learning. Almost every single thing we read about, though some of it makes me nervous, it all makes me so excited! I can’t wait to get in the classroom. I don’t really have as much actual classroom experience as many of my fellow cohorters do, but I have tons of experience with kids. And I love them. I shine whenever a child walks into the room. And I figure that’s a pretty good reason to surround myself with them.
I also knew though, that by the time I was done with college, I was done with school for a while. So I went into Social Work somewhat by chance. It turned out that I loved that too, because I was indeed working with young people and helping them. With Boys and Girls Aid, I had many amazing opportunities to work with a plethora of different kids. I even got to help create and initiate the first and only homeless shelter for youth in Washington County. About a year into that though, the shelter youth had changed from mostly homeless youth to mostly Behavioral Rehabilitation Service youth. It was grueling. And I got burnt out. By January 2008, I was ready to move on….
Between searching for jobs, I also did some research into grad schools. Unfortunately, I realized that Lewis & Clark’s program was the one I wanted to attend about a week too late. So I gave up the dream, at least for a while. A couple months later I got an amazing promotion to case manage a Transitional Living Program for young adults. I LOVED this job. It was not only the perfect job, but the youth in the program were allowed to stay in service for up to two years, so I was able to build really close, amazing relationships with them. At the shelter, it felt as though by the time I finally had a deep conversation with them was when I was driving them to court, and on their way to detention. But with the Transitional Living Program, not only would have weekly, or even daily amazing conversations, I was the sole person in their lives advocating for them and helping give them the tools they needed to create a life for themselves. It was so exciting.
Then, last summer, my best friend broke her back. Needless to say, it was a hard situation to work through. Her parents living in Colorado, it was up to us and her friends to take care of her. Her (at times, morphine-induced) sense of humor was amazing throughout the whole healing process. She had a name for all of her medical crap, like Bruce the back brace, and Cathy the catheter. Laughing through it somehow made it bearable for us all. By December, she walking around and having coffee dates with me just as we’d used to.
One day, we were having a conversation about dreams. The very day before she had broken her back, she had told me her five year plan, which included quitting her job, going to India, and working on some sort of self-sustaining farm for awhile. And the next day it all changed. In discussing this, and how amazing it is that all your plans just change sometimes due to things outside your own grasp, I mentioned grad school. “Guess I’m not going this year either”, I said. Hearing the tinge of lament in my voice, she basically reamed me. She said something along the lines of “Screw you, don’t just give up on or put off your dreams just because you didn’t get around to them. Make them happen.” It was an epiphany. With about two weeks until the deadline, I worked my butt off to apply to grad school.
The other kick in the butt that I had was from a co-worker, who is also in school for early elementary. She was telling me about her program, and I said something like, “that sounds so great! I’ve always wanted to be a teacher too!” She looked at me crossly. Being much older than I, she told me about how long it had taken her to finally settle on this career. She said, “Lani, if you know what you want to do, then do it!” I guess I had never thought of it that way before. But it was all history from there.
I am so happy now and have realized just in these past few weeks how much I enjoy being in school and learning. Almost every single thing we read about, though some of it makes me nervous, it all makes me so excited! I can’t wait to get in the classroom. I don’t really have as much actual classroom experience as many of my fellow cohorters do, but I have tons of experience with kids. And I love them. I shine whenever a child walks into the room. And I figure that’s a pretty good reason to surround myself with them.
Friday, July 24, 2009
From Union Stage Manager to ski instructor to Grad School
The biggest factor that has guided me to teaching is my journey through life and careers. I started my professional life before graduating from college and continued in that vocation for years. I was a professional stage manager for operas, ballets, theatres, rock and roll, and eventually a consultant for all kinds of performing organizations. However, the nature of the work and my rapidly increasing dissatisfaction with it led me to explore a wide variety of other work, from slinging coffee (not fun) to working at a banking call center (less fun) to managing the flowers for the Rose Festival parade (not as fun as you might think), to name a few.
Shortly after moving to Portland, I met my mentor, now the artistic director of Oregon Children’s Theatre. Stan Foote saw my potential as an asset to his organization, and in addition to hiring me to work as a stage manager, he also asked me to work for him as a summer camp administrator. Eventually he guided me into a teaching role. This came as something as a surprise to me, as I had little experience with kids or teaching.
The nature of theatre work, especially for a young practitioner, means that you never work for the same company for more than a month or two, then you move on. From Oregon Children’s Theatre, I went on to become the “child wrangler” and expert for Portland Center Stage and Oregon Ballet Theatre. During these years, I was struggling to define myself as a stage manager, as a Portlander, and as a woman. I rarely enjoyed the actual theatre work, but working with the kids was a blast and clearly something I had a knack for. In fact, it made me a lot happier.
Eventually I decided to move away from the theatre and found work as a docent and studio guide at the Children’s Museum, as a nanny, and as a teacher for a bike safety club teaching five to twelve year olds how to fix bikes and ride in the city. That job led me to a formal, well paying position as an educator with the Bicycle Transportation Alliance, where I helped develop curriculum for the bicycle program as well as a pedestrian safety program. The work was extremely challenging, characterized by a constant change in funding sources (thus necessitating a change in schools, materials, and bosses). But I got into the schools. In four years, I taught in over thirty different classrooms in twenty or so schools. I had grade one through to high school. I got to see so many different kinds of teachers and learn from them.
Eventually I realized that I wanted my own classroom. After that it was just a matter of deciding when and how to realize this new dream. Moving to Lake Tahoe was an unexpected, joyful detour. I learned that California schools aren’t that scary, and my bilingual experiences in Portland (volunteer teaching through a service learning program) were going to serve me very well as a substitute teacher. I also have been able to explore the realm of physical coaching, tagging onto my experience teaching cycling. I became a full-time certified ski instructor with specialized training in teaching for kids. Winter ended, so here I am.
My Decision to Teach
It was about two years ago that I realized I wanted to be a teacher. I remember being shocked at discovering this passion within myself, because I never used to feel very comfortable around children. I tried babysitting twice during high school and walked away saying, "NEVER AGAIN!" I didn't know what to do with the kids, and they refused to watch movies. It is funny to recall those memories now that I have an entirely different perspective on children.
During my undergraduate degree I majored in art history and minored in visual art. I had dreams of being a female Indiana Jones, traveling the world studying history and restoring/preserving historical artwork. I wanted to take a break from school after my undergraduate experience and was rudely awakened by the bleak availability of job options in anything that interested me. So I worked as a receptionist for wages that I could barely live off of. Eventually I was hired by a financial company as a production assistant, which meant that I assisted the marketing department with projects and managed the mail room. It was the nicest building I have ever worked in and I enjoyed having a job with more responsibility. Over time however, the glamor of two hour cocktail lunches in the Pearl District, board meetings, and business professional dress codes started to fade. I realized the amount of waste and frivolous behavior that was so widely accepted in every aspect of the company. It was just a bunch of rich people trying to impress other rich people, and protect their money in life insurance investments. I remember sitting in one of the board rooms in a high back leather chair, staring at a power point presentation about who knows what, and I literally felt like my soul was being sucked out of me. I thought to myself, "What is the opposite of this?"
I decided to apply for a position in an educational setting and ended up working in a Life Learning, special education classroom with the West Linn/Wilsonville school district. My life turned upside down. Suddenly I was getting boogers wiped on me, playing on the carpet during circle time, helping children eat during lunch time, singing more than I ever thought I would and I had never been happier in my entire life. It felt amazing to be in such an honest environment and to build relationships with each of the children that were unique and wonderful. I love the children and I love the school. Even during the challenging times, when I was being hit, intentionally urinated on and managing extreme behaviors, I loved working with the children. I was challenged everyday to be a better person and to learn new ways to communicate. I had so much fun using my imagination to present information to a diverse array of learning styles. We were creative, we played and we had a wonderful sense of community in our classroom. I think I learned more from the children, than they learned from me. For the first time in my life I actually felt alive in a place of employment and I realized that this is exactly where I should be.
......and so my journey at Lewis and Clark began!
During my undergraduate degree I majored in art history and minored in visual art. I had dreams of being a female Indiana Jones, traveling the world studying history and restoring/preserving historical artwork. I wanted to take a break from school after my undergraduate experience and was rudely awakened by the bleak availability of job options in anything that interested me. So I worked as a receptionist for wages that I could barely live off of. Eventually I was hired by a financial company as a production assistant, which meant that I assisted the marketing department with projects and managed the mail room. It was the nicest building I have ever worked in and I enjoyed having a job with more responsibility. Over time however, the glamor of two hour cocktail lunches in the Pearl District, board meetings, and business professional dress codes started to fade. I realized the amount of waste and frivolous behavior that was so widely accepted in every aspect of the company. It was just a bunch of rich people trying to impress other rich people, and protect their money in life insurance investments. I remember sitting in one of the board rooms in a high back leather chair, staring at a power point presentation about who knows what, and I literally felt like my soul was being sucked out of me. I thought to myself, "What is the opposite of this?"
I decided to apply for a position in an educational setting and ended up working in a Life Learning, special education classroom with the West Linn/Wilsonville school district. My life turned upside down. Suddenly I was getting boogers wiped on me, playing on the carpet during circle time, helping children eat during lunch time, singing more than I ever thought I would and I had never been happier in my entire life. It felt amazing to be in such an honest environment and to build relationships with each of the children that were unique and wonderful. I love the children and I love the school. Even during the challenging times, when I was being hit, intentionally urinated on and managing extreme behaviors, I loved working with the children. I was challenged everyday to be a better person and to learn new ways to communicate. I had so much fun using my imagination to present information to a diverse array of learning styles. We were creative, we played and we had a wonderful sense of community in our classroom. I think I learned more from the children, than they learned from me. For the first time in my life I actually felt alive in a place of employment and I realized that this is exactly where I should be.
......and so my journey at Lewis and Clark began!
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